Onward and... onward. Who's to judge what's up or down? It's more like a spiral... Even circling the drain can go on indefinitely if the right conditions are present.
I got in a flamewar last night. Some cheesy scrotal sack posted in my neighborhood page, "Where are my Trump supporters?" That set off a bomb. It started polite with several "not here"s and then there was my puke emoticon. Then some religious nutbag started going on with her scripture bullshit. She literally said, "I'm so glad God is in the whitehouse for the next 16 years". Okay first... Is she trying to say Dump is God? For reals? And what's with the 16 years nonesense? I really wanted to articulate my feelings of irreverence towards her scriptures and I'm a stickler for semantics so in my word smith/trolling with rage self I told her that in her name I will be having gay sex on a bunch of bibles, then smear dog shit all over them and burn them in my fire pit in the back yard. Do you think she got my message? I mean, I sometimes have a hard time with being too vague. Shaun is now worried we'll be lynched. Well I did get a like on it from the moderator so there's that. I gave up trying to change people's minds a long ass time ago. Now I just go trolling once in a while as a way of... I don't know, playing with my food. It's cathartic in its own way and I actually lost all my fucks about "going high". Seriously? Every country conquered was not conquered by people playing nice. While that would be amazing, it's not humans. Humans suck. So if I see a human waving a big target in front of them and they pretty much symbolize a piece of shit helping to take my freedoms away, I'm going in for the kill if I'm in the mood for it. Doesn't make me feel even the slightest bit of guilt.
A couple of friends of mine got married yesterday... my bff actually. There was no wedding though, because they are so scared that Dump will take away their ability to be married that they decided to go ahead and make it legal ASAP and do an actual wedding at a later date. It makes me sad they had to do that and also sad I didn't get to be there. I hope they really do have a wedding though. Fucking Dump, dumping on everything good.
I recently had an appointment with my oncologist. Just a check up and blood tests I get every 6 months to make sure everything is going okay. She had a talk with me about my weight, which has been creeping up ever since my cancer. Before I was diagnosed, I spent several months on Jenny Craig. Normally I am very successful in those types of structured weight loss programs but it wasn't working for me and I had no idea why. A few months later I was diagnosed. I spend a large amount of time hungry... ignoring hunger and eating tiny safe meals and my weight just continues to go up. I'm limited with exercise options since swimming is about the only cardio I can do without making my hips worse. Working nights really sucks ass. She actually suggested I look into bariatric surgery so I'm going to look into it. Fat makes estrogen. Estrogen grows cancer in me and I can't tolerate the estrogen blocking pill. It made me severely suicidal and I had a lot more pain. So, we'll see. I'll go in for a cosultation. It's actually possible I can get insurance to cover it. Sometimes I really hate my meat suit.
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